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31 March 2007 @ 04:52 pm
The Ackles Ass Equation  
This all started when castiel posted the featured picture of Jensen's ass/spinal column in her LJ, and so I told her I'd figure out the equation to the curve to Jensen's ass (and she didn't believe I'd actually do it, lol). I posted this to my LJ yesterday, and lots of people there wanted me to cross-post it here, so here we go. :) The text below is copy/pasted from my LJ:

* * *

I said yesterday that I would figure out the equation to Jensen Ackles' ass (hereby referred to as THE ACKLES ASS EQUATION), and now I've got it! I thought about explaining how I derived this equation, but figured not enough of you care to follow, so I won't waste anyone's time (but if you want me to explain it to you, feel free to ask).

Above is a lovvvely picture of Jensen Ackles' BEAUTIFUL spinal column with a grid super-imposed atop it and a red line marking the curve of his spinal column. *TOUCH*


And here's the equation to create such a curve:


I typed that exactly as you would enter it into a graphing calculator (since I'm betting not many of you want to graph it by hand if you want to graph it at all). I'm using a TI-83 Plus, btw. Now go to your 'window' options and set Xmin to 1 and Xmax to 10 or 11 so that you can narrow down your domain and you don't get the infinite curves that come with a sine function, and make sure your Ymax is set to something higher than 10, and there ya have JENSEN ACKLES' ASS.

The right side is a little bit higher than the picture, but that's only because I had some issues transferring dimensions from the grid on the image to the graph on the calculator. But still. Not half bad, eh?

EDIT: I made icons!!! CLICK! Cuz nothing is official until it is iconned. AM I RIGHT?!

EDIT (6/21/2011): I love that people are still commenting on this over 4 years later! Anyway, a few of you new commenters have been asking me details about the equations and how I derived it, but I regret to inform you I really can't tell you much about it anymore! I did this one bored evening while I was a sophomore chemical engineering major. Presently? I'm in grad school studying English lit./Shakespeare and film studies! I think I'd break my brain right now if I went back to engineering math mode to figure this out. So, you're obviously welcome to continue commenting on this post, but please understand I most likely won't respond, especially with questions about setting up your calculator's range, inputting the equation correctly, etc. Sorry! But thank you so much for your continued interest. :)
Current Mood: boredbored
Current Music: The Beautiful People - Marilyn Manson
没有你日子很黑白: [Ackles] adorable; pokepapered on March 31st, 2007 09:58 pm (UTC)
You're going to be the death of all of us. XD
merlinspants on March 31st, 2007 10:02 pm (UTC)
I'm probably doing something wrong but it's not working aghh.
.potthead on March 31st, 2007 10:04 pm (UTC)
Are you in radian mode?
(no subject) - merlinspants on March 31st, 2007 10:06 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - potthead on March 31st, 2007 10:07 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - merlinspants on March 31st, 2007 10:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - potthead on March 31st, 2007 10:12 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - merlinspants on March 31st, 2007 10:16 pm (UTC) (Expand)
what you're saying is you just didn't: Devour - Jake Lecturebohemu on March 31st, 2007 10:03 pm (UTC)
ROFL. That's amazing. I'm graphing it and saving it as a picture in my calculator later.
(Deleted comment)
she waited in the tower and twirled her hair: Jensen pleasedifyouweremine on March 31st, 2007 10:19 pm (UTC)
You brain is a beautiful thing.

If our math equations had been anything like this, perhaps I would have been a better math student, LOL!
I don't have a soul, I am a soul.blood_ecstasy on June 3rd, 2009 07:47 am (UTC)
Same here my friend. Same here!
Shelby Rosedragonblk17 on March 31st, 2007 10:39 pm (UTC)
I have a graphing calculator, too. I should try and make that during one of my classes. xD
Anetralovehimnot on March 31st, 2007 10:41 pm (UTC)
You = win at life and the internet and are about 1832889229 kinds of awesome, if not more.
Ninanina_d89 on March 31st, 2007 10:42 pm (UTC)
Okay, I have the same calculator.. must do this too ..*nods and looks for the damn thing*
Miss Adora Belle Dearheart: mr universemanzanas_verdes on March 31st, 2007 10:55 pm (UTC)
Wow! I'm impressed with your brain.
Also? this proves that the man was "planned" like that, its not a genetic accident, his mathematically perfect.
sherribonannella on March 31st, 2007 11:05 pm (UTC)
See, if maths had focused on problems like THIS, I mighta paid attention...

*admires the pretty curve*
adaisical: jen you winadaisical on March 31st, 2007 11:20 pm (UTC)
oh good god. I am so glad that someone is using those freaking sin/cosin/tan things for the greater good. thank you, this is great!
Team Stefan <3: TV Guide Jensen 2chasingangel82 on March 31st, 2007 11:58 pm (UTC)
I guess someone was bored LMAO

Pretty though, pity I dont have a calculator like that *throws hands up in air*, at least now I can say that he works out mathematically *facepalm* what some of us fans would do hehe

Thanks for that :D
winter_dreams86 on April 1st, 2007 12:25 am (UTC)
Heh...I wish my calculus prof taught this way. Then maybe I wouldn't be failing the class. ;)
but, Doctor, I am Pagliacciafterimage on April 1st, 2007 12:33 am (UTC)
dragyn: jensen :Ddragynville on April 1st, 2007 12:56 am (UTC)
This is BRILLIANT! :D May I icon it? :D:D
.: dead gpa [potthead]potthead on April 1st, 2007 12:59 am (UTC)
Surrre. If you post it anywhere, just credit me on the entry because I am semi proud of my math work here. ^^;;
(no subject) - dragynville on April 1st, 2007 01:19 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - potthead on April 1st, 2007 01:26 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - dragynville on April 1st, 2007 01:31 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - potthead on April 1st, 2007 01:33 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - dragynville on April 1st, 2007 01:39 am (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - dragynville on April 1st, 2007 08:58 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - qzxy on April 4th, 2007 09:49 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - bohemu on April 1st, 2007 02:07 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - potthead on April 1st, 2007 02:16 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - bohemu on April 1st, 2007 02:35 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - potthead on April 1st, 2007 02:40 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - apey1013 on April 1st, 2007 07:18 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - indigo419 on April 5th, 2007 06:26 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - dragynville on April 5th, 2007 06:44 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - indigo419 on April 7th, 2007 10:03 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Bumblebenni: spn - heartladywolf_ on April 1st, 2007 01:12 am (UTC)
I'm no fan of math - but I do like it better now :)
Very cool.
cutedevil666cutedevil666 on April 1st, 2007 01:32 am (UTC)
Lmaooo that is too great! Jensen has one amazing ass.
Eden: SPN: Dean (Dean/Bargirls OTP)overstreets on April 1st, 2007 01:59 am (UTC)
Jensen's ass sure is inspiring. *_*
Fangirlage like WHOA.: Jensen // Why Hellooooooohopelessfangirl on April 1st, 2007 03:03 am (UTC)




Laura: DOOL; philip approvedlaurondo on April 1st, 2007 03:03 am (UTC)
He sure has a cute ass! :D
Mary: SNraininsmilies on April 1st, 2007 04:27 am (UTC)
Wow. I wish my math homework had problems like this.
Alya.: GREYS -addison.lipslikevelvet on April 1st, 2007 06:34 am (UTC)
OH you just made math a whole lot funner!
not creepy, just a person w eyes: Jensen shadowarabella_hope on April 1st, 2007 07:04 am (UTC)
I LOOOOVE our fandom.
MeryKey: M/A huggingmerykey on April 1st, 2007 07:27 am (UTC)
*laughes* *shakes head*


This man should be affraid of us... really!!

Minotaurminotaurs on April 1st, 2007 07:38 am (UTC)
So, math classes were useful for something after all. Excellent work, A+ [grin]